December 2009
118 posts
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Merry Christmas! Here's the flu.
Thanks, Santa. I guess I can pretty safely say I was naughty this past year to have gotten such a lovely gift.
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The War on Christmas is actually all around.
Gas Station Attendant: Happy Holidays! I would wish you a Merry Christmas but I'm scared.
Me: Why?
Gas Station Attendant: My friend--you see him over there?. He said, 'Merry Christmas,' to some lady and she said, 'Fuck you, I'm Jewish.' (continuing to the driver in the car behind me) What is this world coming to?
The Driver: *look of utter confusion*
Me: *giggles*
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Facebook fuelling divorce, research claims -... →
gamesockson:
moreisnotenough:
I guess it is a step up from “Cheaters” and saves money on private investigators. But it still boggles my brain.
It’s not fueling it, just making it easier to catch. I’m convinced we were always terrible.
And stupid to be conducting divorce-able behavior on Facebook. If you’re going to do stuff like that, either create a different account or use some...
Facebook fuelling divorce, research claims -... →
I guess it is a step up from “Cheaters” and saves money on private investigators. But it still boggles my brain.
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Senate Passes Health Care Overhaul Bill -... →
Not gonna lie, I didn’t think this was going to happen before Christmas.
I wonder how long “negotiations” with the House will take.
Loved this part:
When the roll was called at 7:05 a.m. on Thursday, it was a solemn moment. Senators called out “aye” or “no.” Senator Robert C. Byrd, the 92-year-old Democrat from West Virginia, deviated slightly from the protocol.
“This is...
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Whatever happened to Christmas carolers?
Especially of the “Love Actually” sort. Because I don’t really know of any other type of caroler.
I would pay to have Hugh Grant and a bodyguard show up at my front door and sing “Good King Wenceslas.”
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I figured out why Barnes & Noble puts the books on...
It’s funny to watch people leaving the store slam the door onto those perusing the sale books.
As long as it’s not me getting slammed by the door, obviously.
My favorite Christmas song. Ever.
| Elvis Presley...
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“You musn’t give your heart to a wild thing. The more you do, the stronger...”
– “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”
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Just got off the phone with my dad. He is as high...
nerdgasms:
He can’t see the orthopedic surgeon until Wednesday, but at least he has some good drugs to last him until then.
I am grateful to 8-pound, 6-ounce (almost) newborn baby Jesus (if you believe in that sort of thing) for said drugs for your pops! I hope he gets better soon or at least stays high as a kite until the time he is better.
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Christmas was a riot - The Boston Globe →
Brings a new meaning to “War on Christmas,” doesn’t it?
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WatchIf I ever see this chick anywhere, I’m going to call her Garfield and offer to get her some lasagna.
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Eurostar CANCELED: Train Services Stopped... →
They should have been working on the railroad. All the live-long day.
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Did you know Snoop Dogg used to bake egg mcmuffins...
And he thought working the drive-thru was fun.
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In the 16th century, Turkish women were allowed to...
ohyeahfacts:
(The Amazing Book of Useless Information)
Simultaneously amazing and frustrating. What happened if the husband beat the wife? Or cheated on her? Was she still allowed to divorce him? Or would she have to furtively empty the coffee pot and blame him?
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Try as I may, I just can't pull off plaid.
I’ve tried different colors, different sizes, different styles; but they never work. I just look awkward and stiff.
Who would have thought this, of all things, would be the one that makes me feel old and out of touch? Since when is plaid no longer reserved for school uniforms, old men—like the neighbor on “Home Improvement”—and kilts?
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“Jealousy is a disease. Get well soon.”
– Taylor Royce, “Tough Love 2”
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You would be my hero if...
you brought me chow fun, fried chicken and cupcakes with extra frosting right now!
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Maybe bacon is too much his favorite
E! online tweeted: “Top Chef Finalist and Favorite Dish Parting Ways.”
I clicked the link to find a picture of Kevin (the one with the beard and the pig tat who jams to bacon) and I immediately thought Kevin was taking a break from bacon.
It turns out Kevin and his wife are divorcing.
Reaction #1: Tsk, tsk E! for a misleading headline. Especially since this is a serious topic.
...
Haha. I forgot about wine coolers. How silly ...
are those crazy things?
Only clear thing is that tequila loses. Unless...
love-and-radiation:
yosamanthrax:
Beer tastes like Freshman year.
Gin tastes like Sophmore year.
Vodka tastes like every year after that, except for those two months in 2005 where it tasted like sangria.
Beer tastes like this year, which also tastes like Gin.
Gin tastes like everything, ever. Also, it tastes like the genitals of God.
Vodka tastes like desolation.
99 Apples tastes like...
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I wish I stuck with Spanish beyond high school for the sole reason I want to read Pablo Neruda’s poems as he originally wrote them.
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The vicious cycle of my internal tattoo debate
Sometimes, all I can think about is how much I want a tattoo. Then I see one I think is ridiculous, repulsive, poorly done or some other type of awful and I’m scared back into grateful happiness I haven’t done anything that crazy and permanent to my skin.
Before you think ill of me and get all righteously ired, I understand tattoos are for the owner (and sometimes for the...